Thursday, October 28, 2010

F Is For Epic Mom ~FAIL~

It was Halloween.
And with Halloween comes The Halloween Class Party.
This was my moment to shine.  
I had a plan.
I was going to be Martha Mom.
I was going to having a shining moment.
I carefully picked a sugar cookie recipe that, even after a gazillion reviews, still had four stars.

It even had a secret ingredient.  I was pulling out all the stops.
(that there is sour cream... but ssh it will be our little secret)

As I mentioned yesterday, no sacrifice was too great!

I even read all of the reviews and made a few modifications of my own.
I was on the top of my game.

They were soft and moist, just waiting for some butter cream icing.
My daughter's classmates would remember this day.

The taste would be one they would never forget.

Mothers would call me to find out what recipe I used,
as their children pulled at their pant legs begging them for more.

But then....
After hours of mixing, rolling, cookie cutting, mixing of icing and decorating along with The Agronomist's run to the grocery store,
I realized....
Well after midnight that something was wrong.

My hopes and dreams for these cookies
danced away on clouds of icing sugar.

I had made one huge mistake.
It was going to drive me nuts for years to come.
How could I have overlooked this?
The almond extract with almond oil was my nemesis.

Our school is nut free.

My cookies were staying home.

I should have known it would be too good to be true.
Martha Mom was not to be.

This epic mom FAIL was brought to you by Bungalow'56.
If You want the recipe anyway... you can find it here.

(A blog which continually causes the owner to have to buy larger sized clothes.)

PS This is what I quickly made the next morning. I told the class I had purchased them from the Farmer's  Market, where a local witch sells her baking the week before Halloween.  In my morning stupor and mild depression, I think I may have doubled the baking soda?   Needless to say, there were a lot left over.  

PSS And just to drive the "No Martha" point home, this was a cake brought by another mom.
        Just in case you were wondering?
        She didn't buy it from a witch... she made... and decorated it by herself.

        Lets just be honest here.

        I never had a chance.

This post is linking up with The Marvelous Jenny at Alphabet Thursday. Pin It


  1. Oh that is terrible. At least you got some good cookies out of it. And those cupcakes looked yummy too! (I wouldn't have complained :) )
    Thanks for sharing this 'f' post-

  2. Almonds? who's allergic to almonds?
    Please ship those disastrous allergy inducing cookies to me stat.

  3. Oh man, and those cookies look soooo good! But so do the cupcakes :) I always miss my Martha moment too. At least you cought your mistake before some innocent child ended up in the ER!!!!

  4. That's a bummer about the cookies (now you don't have to share! Are you sure you didn't subconsciously sabotage them?). That store-bought cupcake cake looks kind of gross. Your homemade cupcakes look much better!

  5. ..oh no - I was waiting for these after your positive

  6. Complete and total bummer!!!
    The cupcakes from the witch look pretty yummy too...and the story to go along with it was perfect. Cute cake...but I still think you win!:)
    Enjoy the day

  7. I believe it still taste good. I'd take a cookie. :)

  8. the ghost cookies sound divine~wish I lived next door so I could help you out with them! I am so NOT Martha!! I ordered cookies for my daughter's class, didn't even think twice about it! Weren't the girls happy that the ghosts were a "fail"???hugs,Cathy

  9. Oh crap! It's so easy to slip on things when your own child doesn't have a peanut allergy. During soccer season last summer, when it was my turn to bring the popsicles, I brought a box that had marked on it in teeny tiny print that they were made in a factory with other nut products. Capital "F" for fail, fool and fudge. Who knew popsicles were a no-no? The coach made a big stink about it too. Basically, nuts happen.

  10. Oh man, I feel your pain loud and clear - we're also in a nut free school and I've made similar errors with ingredients ... though the time and effort that you lost certainly trumps anything I ever attempted!! I feel so awful for you b/c those amazing adorable ghost cookies are the cutest things I ever saw!

  11. Dumb question, but does almond extract actually contain almond? Who knew? I thought it was all good ole chemical flavoring. I am so not a Martha mom.

  12. Oh! That is such a sad story! I guess you had to eat those sugar cookies all by yourself!! I am curious as to just how many children in the class are allergic to almonds.

  13. Waaaaaahhhhh!!!

    I would have wept!

    But...oh my! Do they look tasty!

    Maybe getting to keep them wasn't so bad?

    +8 Martha Points for cookies, and no penalty for the wee goof.

  14. Ohhhh, I don't think I would have caught that one and I would have sent the cookies in and had some child have a severe allergic reaction!
    So give yourself some credit for catching it in time!

  15. canuck_gradOctober 29, 2010

    Awww, the cookies are adorable. I hope your family enjoyed them.

    Really though, that's why if your kid is really allergic to nuts, you usually don't let them eat homemade treats anyway. There's just too much risk of someone forgetting something like this... or cross-contaminating if they are making something else with nuts. Did you know the Skor (Heath in the US I think?) Chipits toffee bits have almonds in them too?

    My son is allergic to peanuts. We haven't intentionally given him any large amounts of other nuts yet, but he does eat things that say "may contain tree nuts" and I think he's had things like the Chipits toffee bits before we knew about the peanut allergy. Thankfully, from what I can tell he doesn't seem to be allergic to tree nuts. One nut allergy is enough!

  16. At least your school still lets you bring home-baked treats. Ours all have to be bought. So lame.

  17. Awww how disappointing . Those cookies looked adorable .The cake is beautiful but your cookies were better .

  18. Those.cookies.are.adorable.

    Here's an address. I know these people will take them off your hands. They're all good like that:

    My pleasure.

  19. Oh no! I think your cupcakes look good though :) I'm still very impressed by your ghost cookies!!

  20. sound so hard on yourself! Almond extract is one of my favorite things in the world =)

  21. Well I'll bet your family enjoyed all the extra cookies!
    I never graduated past cupcakes for special school occasions - with sprinkles - whoopee!

  22. The cookies look delicious so no harm done.And loveeeeeeeeeeee the icing on the cupcake and I agree your cupcakes look better than the cake.
    Thanks for visiting my blog.This post was really funny.Made me chuckle .. and of course sympathize.There there..

  23. Oh and you worked so hard at making them and decorating them so cute too! Oh well. Life isn't perfect.~Ames

  24. Dana. You should totally have gotten an A for effort. Those sugar cookies looked yummy. Geez, Louise. And then you had to make the supreme sacrifice to keep them home and eat them.

    That cupcake cake. Na. That wasn't so much. Your stuff was soooo much cuter!

    That's my story, and I'm stickin' to it!

    Thanks for linking to Alphabe-Thursday!

    You always make me laugh.


  25. Your little egg faces are totally cracking me up :D No pun intended!


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