Dear Future Mothers of the world,
It is important for you to know these important facts of life.
Having your children close in age may be difficult,
but what no one tells you is that what may even cause more grief,
is if their calendar birthdays are near each other.
We have two birthdays within four days of each other,
and every year I feel as though it may do me in.
These beautiful cupcakes followed on the heels of the fish cupcakes by two days.
My kitchen looks as though it was under attack.
It is difficult to see what kind of damage was done by the flour bombing,
due to the fact that the icing sugar is covering the damage.
While I have been able to follow my no sugar diet,
this past cupcake week has tested me beyond my limits.
I'm afraid the constant barrage of smarties and rainbow strips along with bowls of
batter and icing have finally done me in.
And it gets worse.
While I'm not proud to admit it.
I may or may not have accidentally flat ironed icing into my hair this morning.
It's the price I've had to pay for living in Cupcakeville.
It hasn't been all bad.
Middlest, who I also call Martha, took this task on herself.
She found the cupcakes here on Pinterest,
and proceeded to bake them herself.
Now being a Martha does come with it's downfalls.
She insisted on baking the cupcakes from scratch.
This takes more eggs than we are used to
and a flour called "cake" flour which we are told creates a far superior lift.
Kind of like Spanx I guess?
Needless to say after an extra run to the supermarket,
the cupcakes were coming out of the oven at 10:30 pm,
with icing still to commence.
This is the birthday girl, along with my amazing cupcake holder container,
You may have heard me mention its merit's "yesterday",
when I did my last cupcake post.... : ?
Anyhoo, with the cupcakes being completed somewhere in the vicinity of 11:30pm,
and the need for them to be whisked off to classmates before the sun was out.
I, with reservations, decided I would still show you these photos that were taken,
under the "beautiful" bulb light of our kitchen.
So my advice to Future Mothers everywhere?
Do not, do your hear me, do not give in to the one time a year you may feel a little
because the moons will surely align and it will come around again...
But it will be one or two months later.
You will thank me.
No one tells you to plan carefully,
and to make sure your children are born at least 60 days apart in the Calendar year.
Otherwise you too, may fall victim to
~Cupcake-itis~ A condition which results in many unfortunate side effects,
some of which may or may not include:
Ticks, especially in the eyebrow area.
These occur after the 99th inquiry from both children
about how many friends they can invite to their birthday party.
Sweating, especially when the aforementioned birthday parties are inquired about.
A rear view which may take on the shape of two very large cupcakes.
OK this may only be a condition only experienced at the Bungalow.
A kitchen that will be lost in combat until you've come out of your sugar coma.
This could take months.
The need for copious amounts of coffee, followed by insomnia.
Children appearing older, usually by a year.
Heat stroke: usually occurring after taking one's head out of the oven for the tenth time.
No one ever tells you about this phenomenon.
But I am here as a spokesperson for all those who did not stay strong.
Wait 6 months.
You'll be happy you did.
Cupcake-itis is not something to take lightly.
Anyone around to help host a birthday party?
Payment will be in cupcakes.
Lots and lots of cupcakes.