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Thursday, October 04, 2012

I Wasn't A Good Parent Today

I wasn't a good parent today.
I called Eldest a
"Princess"
And not in an endearing way.

She's on the go day and night.
A job plus homework
Midnight fire's burning too bright.

Why do I focus then
on the messy room?
The laundry piled up
When she'll be gone so soon?

I never thought I'd forget what
it was like.
To be worried about tomorrow's test
And if my hair looked just right.

Have I really gotten old?
When did it happen?
Please God don't let me be
The mom who no one listens to
Because it's obvious she just doesn't see.

I worry I coddle.
I still make her lunch.
She did do her laundry
A pact with her dad is my hunch.

Why didn't I say thank you?
Instead of responding to stress and huff.
Words leave lasting marks...
Sorry's often aren't enough.

So Eldest
I want you to know.
I don't think you are a "Princess"
Because there are things you've always shown:

You try your hardest.
You really care.
And when you're stressed you need assurance
From a mother who is fair.

"Parent In Training," a title that fits like a glove.
If you'd give me the chance for a do over I want to try again.

But this time  ...With Love.

xoxo,

Mom




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9 comments:

  1. OH how know what you mean!! Thank you for this beautiful poem!!!

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  2. Oh my heart, my friend. Just the thought that I'm still going to suck at this for about another 15 years is really bringing me down. ;) xoxo

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  3. Oh that eldest child has a lot to forgive, huh?!?!

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  4. Yeah, this whole parenting thing is so hard! But it speaks volumes that you are the kind of parent to apologize. You're doing something right.

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  5. Oh do you know what I"D GIVE for an apology when I was her age?????
    YOU ARE INCREDIBLE.

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  6. Little teary here. You're such a good mom Dana...and so wise. We can all use this little reminder.

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  7. Ok, crying here 'cause I'm in the same parent boat.

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  8. Oh Dana.

    I wish I could give you a hug.

    This is absolutely touching.

    And so true.

    Where are the darned rule books when you need them anyway.

    You're doing great.

    Be kind to yourself...motherhood is NOT for sissies.

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  9. Dana, I just love this, and I love your heart. I've had these days, with Boyd, and I just want to start over for the day. You are a beautiful, kind and caring mama....and this post proves that even more. hugs!
    xo

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